Going Around Resistance

What stops you from writing?

Is it a lack of ideas?

Is it the inability to form the thoughts you want?

Is it fear? Fear of ridicule, fear of the unknown, fear of failure, fear of success?

I’ve learned the secret to beating resistance is to not fight it directly. If I can’t get out the thing I want to say, I don’t sit in my chair until it comes. Instead, I find ways to go around the resistance.

I ask questions like those above, just thinking about what is preventing me from doing the thing that I profess to want to do.

Imagine a pipe that connects your brain to the outside world. That pipe has a bunch of different connections, maybe one to your blog, one to Twitter, one to your friends. It’s something that allows the communication of ideas to someone (or many someones).

With resistance, here’s a blockage in the pipe somewhere. Trying to force more and more stuff through is a great way to blow up your pipe. So, instead, what you need to try is looking in the pipe to see where it’s blocked, and what’s blocking it. You can also put someone on the other end of the pipe at one of the outlets, and see what they can see.

You can have conversations about the things you can’t write about with people who don’t even need to understand the things you are saying.

A great example of this in programming is “Rubber Ducking”.

Sometimes, just allowing a bunch of stuff to come out can create the space in your head for the idea to fully bloom and take shape. That’s my biggest issue. I’ve got so many things going on in my head at all times, it gets really hard to keep them all straight, so ideas bump into each other, the get misshapen, and I end up down rabbit holes in conversations as people I’m talking to have their eyes glaze over and I’ve lost them.

That used to feel like a bug, and my fix was to stop sharing. But now, I realize it's a feature. It allows me to see what connects with people, what doesn't, and by being aware, I can catch myself before I completely lose them. Now, I take every opportunity to talk to people about whatever is going on in my head. That allows me the space I need.

A perfect example of this is with the book I'm writing. I had a call with the publisher I've been working with to see how the idea was taking shape after working with her editor, and I ended up talking down all sorts of various connected paths and rambling a bit. Was better than the first time I talked with her, but still had a long way to go.

Then, I was chatting with a friend that I talk to every week, and I said something that I suddenly realized was the whole book, wrapped up into a sentence:

The focus on trying to measure the outcome of systems only benefits the people gambling on the system, not the participants in it.

Bam! I realized that was the entire thesis of the book in one line.

Is that the pipe I thought would release the idea I needed? Nope, but it didn't matter. Suddenly, the pipe connecting me to the publisher was unblocked and I sent it to her. Now I can build out from that thesis and pull in the related ideas I need.

So if you find a given pipe blocked for you, see what other pipes you can start sending ideas down.

Never know what might become unblocked.